I re-read Mark Manson’s “Subtle Art” yesterday.

I enjoyed it more this time than the first time through back when it was released. I guess am more ready to hear it.

A part that that really clicked with me was on struggle.

It’s a piece I used to mention often, but I guess I’d forgotten recently.

We all struggle. Struggle is growth, it’s life. But, we can pick our struggle.

“A more interesting question, a question that most people never consider, is, “What pain do you want in your life? What are you willing to struggle for?” Because that seems to be a greater determinant of how our lives turn out.”

This all has the smell of Buddhist philosophy, life is suffering, life is struggle. Accept it. Take it one step further, and proactively choose your suffering.

Happiness grows from struggles. Well put!

“Because happiness requires struggle. It grows from problems. Joy doesn’t just sprout out of the ground like daisies and rainbows. Real, serious, lifelong fulfillment and meaning have to be earned through the choosing and managing of our struggles.”

Choose a meaningful struggle. Not an idle struggle. Perhaps struggle for health/wealth/wisdom/family over struggling in smaller games.

You must choose (or someone will choose for you).

“What determines your success isn’t, “What do you want to enjoy?” The relevant question is, “What pain do you want to sustain?” The path to happiness is a path full of shitheaps and shame. You have to choose something. You can’t have a pain-free life. It can’t all be roses and unicorns all the time.”

You can pick the thing you want and work back to the struggle and see if you want to eat that daily.

At least, that’s how he’s posing it:

“Who you are is defined by what you’re willing to struggle for. People who enjoy the struggles of a gym are the ones who run triathlons and have chiseled abs and can bench-press a small house. People who enjoy long workweeks and the politics of the corporate ladder are the ones who fly to the top of it. People who enjoy the stresses and uncertainties of the starving artist lifestyle are ultimately the ones who live it and make it.”

All outcomes/results have their price!

The above were all quotes from Chapter 2 “Happiness is a Problem”.

I typically pick a struggle, then am happily surprised at the results that flow from it. E.g. write many helpful tech books and tutorials (easy struggle for me, hard/boring for others) and get financial success (yay!).

I probably should gravitate back to this type of work, or something like it.

What other struggles do I choose?

  • Reading 200-300 books per year, I guess it gives me some superficial background knowledge on a broad collection of things.
  • Grinding at the gym 5 days per week, results in a strong and fit body.
  • Investing, results in preservation and growth of wealth.
  • Daily writing (this), externalize thoughts leading to slightly clearer thinking/action.
  • Play/work with the kids (it can be hard work, believe me), strong family bonds.
  • And on.

Struggle on.